Who wants to be a millionaire Naruto style
by Rockcrab
Summary: Who wants to be a millionaire... duh. Rated T because I say everything is rated T because that is how I do... This summary is lame, but the story is better. Read and Review so I can be happy. Other animes are now included.
1. Itachi!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto

Author's note- Another one I made by myself. I'm so proud.

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"Hey everybody! This is your host Kakashi on Who wants to be a millionaire! Sorry, I'm late because I had to help an old lady find directions... she had a heavy bag, actually... ,"says Kakashi with an overly large smile on his face, "Your contestant tonight is going to be... Itachi Uchiha? That can't be right, can it? Anko!"

"Yes Kakashi?" asks Anko from up in the place where all the things controlling the lights and stuff are.

"Itachi Uchiha? From the Akakstuki? Are you sure?" asks Kakashi.

"Yes Kakashi. Don't you go over the contestants before the show?" asks Anko.

"Not sense they got rid of the fastest fingered question..." answers Kakashi, "Ok... Here he is now!" Itachi walks onto the stage slowly and sits down.

"Can we get this over with." asks Itachi, well he more like states. He doesn't really _ask_ anything.

"Ok, but first, did you bring any family with you?" asks Kakashi.

"No." states Itachi.

"Ummm... friends?" asks Kakashi.

"No."

"Did anyone even stalk you?" asks Kakashi starting to seem uneasy.

"Yes."

"Who?"

"Kisame and a couple of fangirls."

"Kisame?"

"Yeah. I think he invited them to bother me. It didn't work. I killed most of them." says Itachi, "Can we start now."

"Yeah... so with that... er, cheerful note, lets begin!" says Kakashi, "Ok the rules are-"

"I know the stupid rules. Continue." says Itachi not wasting any time he could be spending doing something important.

"Er... question number one. How many tails does the demon inside Naruto have? A. one, B.negative three, C.nine, or D. a head.?" asks Kakashi.

"C." says Itachi.

"Is that your fi-"

"Yes." says Itachi not letting Kakashi finish his stupid question.

"Correct!" yells Kakashi as the croud of fangirls shriek in happiness and Kisame just sits down staring at Itachi, "Next question."

"Ok."

"What is Sasuke's last name? What kind of question is that? That is so stupid!" starts Kakashi.

"Hurry up..." says Itachi.

"Uh, A.Uzamaki, B.Uchiha, C.Orochimaru, or D. ICE CREAM." says Kakashi without any enthusiasm.

"B."says Itachi.

"Again correct! Next question. If you get this right you will get 1000 dollars regardless of what happens!" says Kakashi hurriedly before the fangirls can scream again.

"Get on with it." says Itachi.

"Ok, Question number three. Who killed his entire clan except for his brother? WHAT! WHAT A STUPID QUESTION! IS IT A. Naruto, B. Hinata, C.Itachi, or D.Konohamaru? What a worthless question." says Kakashi very annoyed.

"C." says Itachi.

"Correct! Oh, and that concludes the time we have tonight! Toon in next time on, Who Wants To Be a Millionaire!" says Kakashi.

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Author's note- sorry that was so lame. I was bored, I probably should have updated my other fanfictions, but I didn't want to, Sorry.


	2. Itachi continued!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or who wants to be a millionaire... yeah.

Author's note- I was sick when I wrote this, so if there are mistakes, then I'm sorry.

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"And now for your host, Kakashi!" says Anko from the box with the controlls, "Uh... Kakashi! Kakashi? KAKASHI?! KAKASHI!"

"And here I am!" says Kakashi walking onto the set.

"Do you always have to make me look like an idiot?" asks Anko.

"Only on live television." says Kakashi, "Because that is where... I... I... yeah."

"Thanks." says Anko sarcastically.

"Now we will continue with our guest... ug, Uchiha Itachi." says Kakashi losing all happiness, "Here is... Uchiha Itachi, woohoo." Itachi walks onto the stage and Kakashi hits his head with his hand and says to himself, "Not again..."

Itachi sits down. "Hi Itachi! Are you ready to continue on 'Who wants to be a millionaire'?" asks Kakashi.

"Whatever." says Itachi.

"I'll take that as a yes!" says Kakashi nervously, "So remember the rules, you get three life lines-"

"I know. Let's continue." says Itachi.

"Question 5!" says Kakashi.

"Uh, Kakashi..." says Anko.

"Yes?" says Kakashi.

"We are on question 4." says Anko.

"Oh, Question number four!" says Kakashi like nothing happened, "Who is Temari and Kankuro's brother?"

"I don't care." says Itachi.

"I'll take that as an ask the audience!" says Kakashi, "Ok audience. Is it A.Naruto, B.Kakashi..., C.Gaara, or D. Scooby Doo... who is that? Scooby Doo?"

The audience finishes thier answering. "The results are 93 percent Gaara, 4 percent Naruto, 2 percent Kakashi... wow you people are stupid..., and 1 percent scooby doo! So, uh, who thought I was the answer?" asks Kakashi.

"I'll go with whatever the audience says." says Itachi.

"Ok! And you are... correct! But seriously, who said I was Gaara?" asks Kakashi.

"I did." says a voice from the audience.

"Who said that?" asks Kakashi.

"Me." says the audience member.

"Ok! What is your name?" asks Kakashi.

"Kisame..." says Kisame.

"Why would you say it was me?" aks Kakashi.

"Because I'm bored and want to leave." says Kisame.

"Whatever, next question!" says Kakashi, "What is Naruto's catch phrase? Is it A.Believe it, B.Idiot, C.I hate Sasuke, or D.Pervy sage!."

"I'll ask Kisame." says Itachi.

"Why?" asks Kakashi, "After he just said he wants to make you lose?"

"I want to lose." says Itachi.

"Ummm, ok. Kisame! What is your answer?" asks Kakashi.

"C." says Kisame with a smirk.

"Are you sure you want that answer Itachi?" asks Kakashi.

Itachi nods his head a little signifing 'yes.'

"Ok, uh... You picked I hate Sasuke! And the correct answer is..." Kakashi pauses for the dramatic theme music, "Where is the theme music..." The theme music goes off randomly and Kakashi falls over.

"ANKO! What the-" asks Kakashi.

"We are on public television Kakashi." says Anko.

"Oh... yeah..." says Kakashi nervously.

"The answer..." says Itachi.

"Oh, the answer is A, believe it. I'm sorry, you leave with 1000 dollars." says Kakashi handing the money to Itachi when Kakuzu jumps off the stage.

"Give me the money." says Kakuzu.

"Ok." says Itachi who walks away.

"Uh... ok. We'll see you next time on... Who Wants To Be a Millionaire!" says Kakashi. Kakuzu is walking around staring at the money happily.

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Author's note- ok, you people pick who is next. Shikamaru, Orochimaru, Kankuro, or Gaara. I hope you like it. R & R please.


	3. Shikamaru!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or Who wants to be a millionaire.

Author's note- I am so disappointed... two reviews... but thanks two the two reviewers!

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"And now for your host!" says Anko, "Kakashi!" She pauses and waits for Kakashi to come out.

_Ten minutes later_

"KAKASHI!" yells Anko.

"I'm here!" says Kakashi, "Who is our next contestant?"

"Shikamaru! You're supposed to say that Kakashi!" says Anko.

"Shikamaru!" says Kakashi as if he knew it. A slapping sound comes from Anko's box.

Shikamaru walks onto the stage with his hands in his pockets.

"Hi Shikamaru! How are you and welcome to Who wants to be a Millionaire!" says Kakashi.

"Yeah, I'm ok." says Shikamaru.

"So how did you get here?" asks Kakashi.

"Ino dragged me." says Shikamaru.

"What a _drag_, ne?" says Kakashi.

"Yeah..." says Shikamaru.

"So any friends, family, stalkers here with you...?" asks Kakashi.

"Uh, Ino, Choji, Temari, couple of random girls I don't know... oh, and I think some creepy guy with the name Kakuzu or something..." says Shikamaru.

"Oh, say hello folks!" says Kakashi as the audince sounds like a cricket, but Anko makes it sound like the audience is roaring.

"Shikamaru, now we can start Who-" starts Kakashi. "Shikamaru! Wake up!"

"Huh? Oh, yeah." says Shikamaru.

"Now we can play, Who Wants to be a Millionaire!" says Kakashi.

_Do Da Do, Do Do Da Do DAAAAAAA, Do._

"Thank you Anko..." says Kakashi. "First question. Who beats Neji in the chunnin exams? A. Neji, B. Gaara, C.Naruto, or D. Sakura?"

"..." says Shikamaru.

"SHIKAMARU! IF YOU LOSE...!" starts Ino.

"Yeah, yeah... how troublesome..." Shikamaru mumbles. "The answer is C. Naruto."

"Is that your final answer?" asks Kakashi.

"Yes." says shikamaru.

"And you are... correct!" says Kakashi and the audience cheers.

"Ok, question number 2!" says Kakashi. "What is 5 x 5 plus 10 - 4 x 7 divided by 6 plus 1 - 29? Don't forget the order of operations Shikamaru! Is it A.36.1666666, B. 1, C.98765421345.123, or..."

"30 1/3" says Shikamaru with his eye's closed.

"D.30 1/3..." says Kakashi. "Correct and the croud goes wild!"

"Could we hurry this up? I want to go watch clouds..." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, Question number 3, if you get this you get one thousand dollars regardless of what happens!" says Kakashi excitedly.

"Wow." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, who is Kisame's partner? A.Itachi, B.Tobi, C.Deidara, or D.Kakuzu?" asks Kakashi.

"I don't know." says shikamaru.

"Do you want to phone a friend?" asks Kakashi.

"Sure." says Shikamaru, "I'll call Tobi." says Shikamaru.

"How do you know him?" asks Kakashi.

"He had layed down next to me when we watched clouds. He saw... a kunia I think." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, Anko call Tobi!" says Kakashi.

_Ring, Ring!_

"Hello, this is Pein..." says Pein.

"This is Kakashi, is Tobi there?" asks Kakashi.

"Sure... wait, what did he do this time?" asks Pein.

"Well..." says Kakashi.

"I'll let Deidara deal with it." says Pein.

"Hello? This is Deidara..." says Deidara.

"We need to talk to Tobi..." says Kakashi.

"If Tobi harmed you in anyway I laugh, but if he only mentally scarred you, give me your name and address and I'll send over a therapist..." says Deidara.

"Let me talk to TOBI!!!" yells Kakashi.

"Ok," says Deidara.

"Hello! Tobi is Tobi!" says Tobi.

"Hi Tobi! Do you remember Shikamaru?" asks Kakashi.

"Yeah! He was fun! Tobi and Shikamaru watched clouds!" says Tobi.

"Ok. well he is on Who Wants to be a Millionaire and he has a question for you!" says Kakashi.

"Ok." says Tobi.

"Shikamaru! Your time starts now!" says Kakashi.

"Ok.Who is Kisames partner? Tobi, Deidara, Itachi, or Kakuzu..." says Shikamaru.

"Well, Deidara is Tobi's partner, Kakuzu isn't Kisame's partner so the answer is Itachi." says Tobi.

"Five seconds." says Kakashi.

"Tobi is 95 percent sure, but it might be Tobi..." says Tobi.

"Time is up!" says Kakashi.

"I say the answer is Itachi." says Shikamaru.

"That is correct!" says Kakashi. "oh, and we are out of time! We will continue next time on Who Wants to be a Millionaire!"

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Author's note- Yay! This is funner than Itachi's was. You people should review more, when I'm done with Shikamaru I'm gonna wait for someone to pick the next one.


	4. Shikamaru continued!

Disclaimer- I do not own the show Naruto or the show who wants to be a millionaire.

Author's note- Thanks for all the reviews! It make me want to keep writing this one.

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"Our host... Kakashi." says Anko.

"Hi everyone!" says Kakashi.

"On time aren't you?" says Anko.

"Oh, yeah..." says Kakashi and he walks away.

"I didn't mean to leave!" says Anko.

_7 minutes later_

"And here I am!" says Kakashi.

"Can't you stand being on time once in your life?" asks Anko.

"No." says Kakashi. "Ok, lets re-cap. Last time on Who Wants to be A Millionaire... Shikamaru won one thousand dollars and he used his phone a friend! Everybody, Shikamaru!" There are a bunch of fan girl squeals from the audience.

"Shikamaru?" Asks Kakashi. Ino comes out onto the stage dragging a sleeping Shikmaru, she puts him in the chair.

"Shikamaru!" says Kakashi.

"I'm up, where am I?" asks Shikamaru.

"You are on Who Wants to be a Millionaire!" says Kakashi.

"I thought that was a dream..." says Shikamaru.

"Well it wasn't and so far you have one 1,000 dollars!" says Kakashi.

"..." says Shikamaru.

"Wake up!" says Kakashi.

"I'm not asleep, it was just too troublesome to answer." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, question number four!" says Kakashi. "Who gave Kakashi his sharringan eye..."

"Are you ok?" says Shikamaru.

"No..." says Kakashi.

"Well don't tell me about it..." says Shikamaru.

"Is it A.Sarutobi, B.Orochimaru, C.Obito, or D.Itachi." says Kakashi pretending he isn't all sad over his freind, and doing a bad job of covering it.

"C. Obito." says Sikamaru.

"How did you know that?" asks Kakashi.

"I walked by Gai and he was talking to himself." says Shikamaru.

"Question 5!" says Kakashi. "Who are the three legendary Sannin? A.Kakashi, Gai, and Asuma, B.Orochimaru, Tsunade, and Jariya, C.Itachi, Hidan, and Kisame, or D. Scooby Doo, Shaggy, and Velma too... Who are those people?"

"I'll say B." says Shikamaru.

"Is that your final answer?" asks Kakashi. Shikamaru nods his head.

"Correct!" says Kakashi. "If you get the next question right you will leave with 20,000 dollars!"

"Ok, Who used to work fo Orochimaru, but was then thrown away like trash?" says Kakashi. "A.Deidara, B.Anko, C.Asuma, or D.Freddy Flinstone? Who is Freddy..."

"I'll use 50-50." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, Anko remove two of the wrong answers!" says Kakashi. Deidara and Anko are removed. "Anko! topsay heatingcay koay?"

"inefay!" says Anko, mimicking Kakashi's use of Pig-Latin. The answer Anko comes back and so does Deidara, then Freddy Flinstone and Asuma dissapear.

"I understand pig-latin." says Shikamaru.

"huay hoay..." says Kakashi.

"You can stop Kakashi." says Anko.

"What is your final answer?" asks Kakashi.

"I'll say B. Anko." says Shikamaru.

"I'm so sorry... you'll have to stay here for another question and you have won 20, 000 dollars!" says Kakashi.

_Da Do Da, Da Da Da Do, DAAAAAAAAA, Da _Kakashi falls over.

"Thank you Anko..." says Kakashi as he stands up and brushed his clothes. "And that's all the time we have, so join us next time on, Who Wants to be a Millionaire!"

"I have to come back? What a drag..." says Shikamaru.

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Author's note- this one is fun to do! I hope you liked it! R & R or I may not continue...


	5. Techinical difficulties?

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or Who Wants to be a Millionaire.

Author's note- Sorry I took so long to update guys...

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"I'm here!" says Kakashi arriving thirty minutes late. Then he realizes no one is here at all. "ANKO! WHY IS NO ONE IN HERE!"

"Stop yelling at me!" says a voice Kakashi doesn't recognize from the box that controls everything.

"Wait... who are you?" asks Kakashi.

"That is a matter of no importance!" says the voice.

"Wait I think I recognize that voice..." says Kakashi.

"No... no... you don't recognize my voice," says the voice with a cheesy French like accent.

"I'm not an idiot Kabuto." says Kakashi.

"How did you know?" says Kabuto.

"Well, I know you have a terrible french accent." says Kakashi.

"Well... wait... how do you know that?" asks Kabuto.

"Ahem... that is a matter of no importance..." says Kakashi.

"I only use that voice when I am in the- YOU DID WHAT!" says Kabuto as he makes lighting almost strike Kakashi. "Cool! How did I do that? Kakashi you pervert!" Kabuto again tries to kill Kakashi and Kakashi runs out of the building screaming like a little girl with lightning clouds following him. Then Orochimaru pops up from no where.

"Uh... we are experiencing technical difficulties." says Orochimaru. He jumps out of the way of the lightning. "Watch it you Idiot!"

"Sorry Orochimaru-sama..." says Kabuto. Kakashi runs back into the building still screaming and then he stops.

"Hey! That's my job!" Kakashi yells at Orochimaru. Then the phone rings.

"Hello." says Kakashi to the phone asOrochimaru and Kabuto start fighting over who should get to answer the phone. "Oh shut up you two! You are acting like six year olds!"

"I am six! My birthday is on leap year!" says Kabuto as a matter of factily.

"Well shut up I am on the phone!" says Kakashi.

PHONE CONVERSATION

"Hello? Who is this?" asks Kakashi.

"This is -ACHOOO- Anko." says Anko.

"Well where are you?" asks Kakashi.

"I am -cough- home sick -cough-." says Anko.

"WHAT! I AM HERE WITH KABUTO AND OROCHIMARU BECAUSE YOU ARE SICK! YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO BE ON THE TV!" Yells Kakashi. Orochimaru and Kabuto stop fighting because his yelling scared them, but only for a minute.

"Sorry..." says Anko. "I called for a replacement and they said they would send some guy over."

FLASHBACK (KAKASHI)

_Kakashi sees a man lying on the side walk with a name tag that says 'Hello my name is Tim. I am filling in for Anko.' _

_Kakashi ignores him and walk on thinking, "there are plenty of Anko's in the world... in the studio... just a coincedence..."_

FLASHBACK ENDED

"Haha... yeah." says Kakashi.

"Well, I'll be in two days." says Anko.

"Fine." says Kakashi.

PHON CONVERSATION ENDED

"So who was it?" asks Kabuto.

"It was Anko." says Kakashi.

"Anko? Dos she still hate me?" asks Orochimaru.

"Like hell." says Kakashi.

"Oh... good." says Orochimaru.

"Can you open the stupid doors Kabuto!" yells Kakashi.

"I don't know how..." says Kabuto.

"PUSH THE BUTTON THAT SAYS OPEN!" yells Kakashi.

"Oh..." says Kabuto and the doors open. "Seems reasonable."

Everyone gets in and then the doors shut and the show is about to start when...

_do da do, do do da do, daaaaaaaa, do!_

"WHAT!" yells Kakashi. 

"I guess the show's over." says Orochimaru.

"Yeah... well let's go." says Kakashi as he tries to open the door. It is locked. They are all locked.

"What a drag." says Shikamaru. Then all of his fan girls in the audience flood onto the stage. Not to mention Kabuto's fan girls, Kakashi's fan girls, and Orochimaru's few fangirls.

"Oh no..." says Kakashi.

"Who are you people?" asks Orochimaru.

"Fan girls!" they all yell.

'What's a fan girl?" asks Orochimaru.

"We actually have fan girls?" asks Kabuto.

"RUN TO THE SAFETY OF THE BOX!" yells Kakashi

"How troublesome." says Shikamaru running for his life. They all get into the box and no one else can get in. They stay in there for a while and then they all fall asleep. Shikamaru fell asleep first. They waited out the night and then the next day they all got up and decided that they needed to continue the show so Kabuto was stuck in the box again and so was Orochimaru.

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Author's note- That was chaotic. Ok, next time it will actually continue. If you didn't like this type of chapter tune in next time on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' because it will be back to normal except Kabuto and Orochimaru will be in Anko's place.


	6. Shikamaru continued yet again!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or who wants to be a millionaire.

Author's note- Here you go people. Sorry again for the wait. I'll update Tobi and Deidara next...

* * *

_Last time on who wants to be a millionaire-_

_**"PUSH THE BUTTON THAT SAYS OPEN!" yells Kakashi.**_

_**"Oh..." says Kabuto and the doors open. "Seems reasonable."**_

_**Everyone gets in and then the doors shut and the show is about to start when...**_

_**do da do, do do da do, daaaaaaaa, do!**_

_**"WHAT!" yells Kakashi.**_

_**"I guess the show is over." says Orochimaru.**_

_And now for the continuation..._

"Uh... introduce me..." hisses Kakashi into a little microphone on his shirt.

"Oh yeah..." says Kabuto from the box, "And now for your host Kakashi, who is not late for once in his life."

"So the time before the last Shikamaru was here and he won 20,000 dollars and he used his 50-50, and before that he used his phone a friend." says Kakashi.

"So, heerrrreee's Shikamaru." says Orochimaru from the box. Shikamaru is already on stage (they were all locked in over night so they are all there already).

"Question number..." Kakashi starts to say. "What are we on?"

"Uh..." says Kabuto and Orochimaru.

"We were on question number seven." says Shikamaru.

"You sure?" asks Kakashi.

"Yes." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, question number seven!" says Kakashi pretending he didn't ask anybody anything, "What is the name of Gaara's inner demon? Is it A.Peter Cottontail, B.Shikaku, C.Jariaya, or D.George Bush... George who-now? I hate it when they give me these type of answers..."

"Yeah, not to mention people realize it is the wrong answer with all of your rambling..." mutters Orochimaru.

"I'll say that the answer is B. Shikaku." says Shikamaru.

"And that is correct!" says Kakashi. "Why are there no cool effect lights? Or music?"

_daaaaaaa da_

"Thank you Orochimaru..." says Kakashi, then he coughs slightly. "Never thought I'd say that... on to question number eight!"

_Dum Dum Dum do dum dum do dum dum, dum dum dum do dum dum, do dum dum (to the Star Wars theme)_

Someone in the audience coughs. "Sorry," says Kabuto.

"Ok, question number eight." says Kakashi. "What is the adjective in the following sentence? Scooby Doo sings a stupid song to the werewolf. What kind of sentence is that? Why does this person keep on appearing in these questions? Uh... is it A.song, B.Werewolf, C.Stupid, or D.Scooby Doo?"

"The answer is C. Stupid, just like the question." says Shikamaru.

"Correct!" says Kakashi, the audience doesn't do anything because they are tired from attacking them all all night.

"Things worked much smoother with Anko around..." Kakashi mutters. "If you answer the next question, question 9, correctly, then you will leave with 100,000 dollars regardless of what happens here tonight, uh, today!"

"Wow." says Shikamaru with his eye's closed.

"Ok, question number nine! What is the name of Orochimaru's largest snake that would kill him if it got the chance?" says Kakashi. "Is it A.Lord Voldimort, B.Scrappy Doo, C.Lord Manda, or D.The Beetles... that's a good band..." Kakashi starts humming the song 'we all live in a yellow submarine' to himself.

"The answer is C. Lord Manda." says Shikamaru.

"Correct! _We all live in a yellow submarine, a_ _yellow submarine, a yellow submarine... _oh..." says Kakashi. "You win 100,000 dollars tonight, uh, today... no matter what! Next question! Question number 10! Only five questions away from the million! Ok, Who took over the position of Hokage after The Third Hokage died? Was it A.Tsunade, B. Spongebob, C.Shikaku, stupid raccon wishes... or D. Orochimaru... Riddle."

"That is not my last name!" says Orochimaru.

"Well I thought it was... I mean, you are blood related to a Tom Riddle right?" asks Kakashi.

"NO!" yells Orochimaru.

"Oh... Mr.Riddle lied to me... then what is your last name?" says Kakashi.

"Uh..." says Orochimaru

"Can I answer now?" asks Shikamaru falling asleep.

"Yes." says Kakashi.

"The answer is A. Tsunade..." says Shikamaru.

"Correct!" says Kakashi.

_do da do, do do da do, daaaaaaaa, do!_

"Ok, shows over!" says Kakashi.

"Finally!" says Orochimaru.

"Orochimaru-sama... the door's still locked..." says Kabuto.

* * *

Author's note- Sorry I did the Orochimaru Riddle thing. Tom Riddle, betterly known as Lord Voldimort by the way if you don't know the Harry Potter Series that well...


	7. Shikamaru with no audience!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or who wants to be a millionaire.

Author's note- Sorry for my slowness, but I have many stories and I can't keep up all the time.

* * *

_Last time on WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE:_

**_"Can I answer now?" asks Shikamaru falling asleep._**

**_"Yes." says Kakashi._**

**_"The answer is A. Tsunade..." says Shikamaru._**

**_"Correct!" says Kakashi._**

**_do da do, do do da do, daaaaaaaa, do!_**

**_"Ok, shows over!" says Kakashi._**

**_"Finally!" says Orochimaru._**

_And now for the continuation..._

"And now for your host... Kakashi!" says Anko back from her sickness vacation.

"Yay! You're back, where did Kabuto and Orochimaru go?" asks Kakashi.

"I unlocked the door and they left." says Anko.

"Oh," says Kakashi. "And now for Shikamaru, back again!" Shikamaru walks back on to the stage and sits down in the chair. "Hi Shikamaru, and how are you today?"

"Tired." says Shikamaru.

"Ok, and you are now on question number 11, all together you will leave tonight no matter what with 100,000 dollars! You've used all of your three help things except ask the audience." says Kakashi.

"Whatever." says Shikamaru.

"So question number 11! Here it is..." says Kakashi, "What is the next shape in the pattern? The pattern is, a line, an angle, a triangle, and a quadrilateral. Is it A.Pentagon, B.Polyhedron, C.Pentapox, or D.Captain Kirk, some of these don't even make sense, what does the Captian Kirk Polygon look like? A picture of a head? And Pentapox? That sounds like a disease!"

"Shut up Kakashi, you're giving away the answer!" hisses Anko.

"Fine, fine." says Kakashi.

"The answer is A. Pentagon." says Shikamaru.

"Correct!" yells Kakashi. There are no cheers at all. Kakashi looks around the audience seats and only Ino and Kakuzu are there. "Where is everyone?"

"They also left when I opened the door." says Anko.

"So we have no audience?!" yells Kakashi.

"Correct! You have won... nothing!" says Anko.

"Thanks." says Kakashi sarcastically. "Wait... no audience means we aren't making any money..."

"No, we have sponsors." says Anko.

"Oh, good." says Kakashi.

"Yeah, but they are threatening to leave. We haven't done commercials for them." says Anko.

"Ok... that's bad. Question 12! If this is answered correctly Shikamaru is up to 300,000 dollars, but this is not garunteed, if he wants to leave with the money at any point, he can." says Kakashi. "Ok, next question, What is the name of the 'supercontinent' that was once on Earth billions of years ago, the continent that was all of the landmasses all together?"

"Kakashi, we need to do a commercial soon or we will go off air." says Anko.

"Is it A.Pangea, B.Bigland, C.Akatsuki, or D.Mvemjsun. Oh, I get it, m is for mercury, v is for venus, e is for earth, m is for mars... and so on." says Kakashi ignoring Anko completely.

"The answer is..." starts Shikamaru.

"AND NOW A WORD FROM OUR SPONSORS!" yells Anko.

**Do you believe you can fly?**

**Do you believe you can touch the sky?**

**Well then come to Don'ttrustus airlines to learn how to fly! Because remember...**

**If you believe you can fly...**

**If you can't you will surely die!**

**So come and learn to fly at DON'TTRUSTUS AIRLINES TODAY!**

**--**

**Chicken! CHICKEN! CHICKEN!!**

**If you love chicken, then come to Konneticut Fried Chicken today! **

**What? Oh, I meant Kalifornia Fried... no?**

**Kanada... no? ****Kontana? Kissouri? Ketchup?**

**Oh I give up!**

**--**

"Thank you." says Anko. "We still get paid for that last one right...?"

"The answer is A. Pangea." says Shikamaru.

"CORRECT!" says Kakashi. Ino claps. Kakashi rolls his eyes, one person clapping, great for business. "Now for the next question! Question 13! You could leave with 400,000 dollars if you get this right, but you lose 200,000 dollars and go back down to 100,000 , wouldn't that be a shame?"

_Doo da da, doo doo, da da daaaaaaaaa, doo!_

"Wait we're done?" asks Kakashi.

"Yes." says Anko.

"But it was only two questions!" says Kakashi.

"Yes, but we had commercails this time." says Anko.

"Fine, but we finish with Shikamaru next time! He's making me tired." says Kakashi yawning.

"Take a nap -" starts Anko. Kakashi falls asleep. "-when you get home." Anko slaps her head. "Next time Shikamaru will be back! So... come and join us next time on, Who Wants To Be A Millionaire!"

Author's note- Sorry about the commercials, but they had to be somewhere right? Can't go twenty minutes without them these days.


	8. Does Shikamaru win?

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or who wants to be a millionaire.

Author's note- It's back and Shikamaru is going to finish tonight/day! Whatever it is for whomever you are at whatever time it may be!

* * *

_Last time on Who wants to be a millionaire..._

**"The answer is A. Pangea." says Shikamaru.**

**"CORRECT!" says Kakashi. Ino claps. Kakashi rolls his eyes, one person clapping, great for business. "Now for the next question! Question 13! You could leave with 400,000 dollars if you get this right, but you lose 200,000 dollars and go back down to 100,000 , wouldn't that be a shame?"**

**Doo da da, doo doo, da da daaaaaaaaa, doo!**

**"Wait we're done?" asks Kakashi.**

**"Yes." says Anko.**

_And now for the continuation..._

"Ok!" says Kakashi. He claps and then rubs his hands together. "Now to finish with Shikamaru, and the audience is wild!"

"Uh, Kakashi, no, the audience is not wild." says Anko.

"Huh?" says Kakashi.

"They are still gone. No one got the schedule because no one came last time so... no audience again." says Anko.

"Not more commercials!" yells Kakashi falling to his knees and trying, but failing horribly, to pull out his hair.

"You'll never get it off Kakashi." says Anko.

"How would you know?" asks Kakashi.

"We tried to shave it when you fell asleep that one time, it didn't even budge." says Anko.

"I knew it was gravity defying, but I never-" starts Kakashi and then he realizes the meaning of what she said.. "Wait... YOU DID WHAT?! AND WHO IS 'WE'!"

"We... we are..." starts Anko. "Oh, look! The audience is here! They must have seen the show on and rushed over!"

"I'm not falling for that." says Kakashi. The audience cheers madly as Shikamaru walks onto the stage.

"I wasn't kidding." says Anko.

"Now I look stupid on the air don't I..." says Kakashi.

"Yup." says Anko.

"Ok Shikamaru, now for question number 13, if you get this right you leave with 400,000 dollars!" says Kakashi. "Ok, What kind of galaxy is the milky-way galaxy? Is it A.Spiral, B.El...ipt...ic...al, or something, C.Irregular, or D. Triangle."

"It's A. Spiral." says Shikamaru.

"Correct!" yells Kakashi flashing a smiles like Gai's.

"Kakashi, that smile is really creepy." says Anko.

"Question 14! If you get this correct you leave with 800,000 dollars!" says Kakashi. The audience yells and claps happily. "Ok, now for a really hard question! What was one of Newton's laws? A. Don't kill people, B.Don't drink and drive, C. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, or D. Don't spit on the side walk." Shikamaru was asleep again. Kakashi was about to wake him up when Shikamaru actually answered.

"Newton's laws of motion are that 1. An object in motion tends to stay in motion and an obect at rest tends to stay at rest, this is also called the law of inertia, 2.The second law states that the acceleration of an object is dependent upon two variables - the net force acting upon the object and the mass of the object. The acceleration of an object depends directly upon the net force acting upon the object, and inversely upon the mass of the object. As the force acting upon an object is increased, the acceleration of the object is increased. As the mass of an object is increased, the acceleration of the object is decreased, and 3. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. As it works with a rocket. The rocket works all three laws of Newton. The first is that the rocket needs a force to get it moving, the second that the force pushing the rocket up must be greater than the force of gravity on the ship, and the third is that the fuel pushes down causing the rocket to be given an equal and opposite force, propelling it upward into the sky. Therefore the answer is C." says Shikamaru in his sleep.

"Uh... I have no idea what you just said... but C is correct!" says Kakashi. "WAKE UP!"

"Huh?" says Shikamaru waking up. "Why does my mouth hurt?"

"That's a good question. Maybe because you just stated Newton's laws and how they apply to a rocket launch!" says Kakashi, "And you got it right..."

"Ok..." says Shikamaru.

"This is the last question! If you get it right you could leave with 1,000,000 dollars!" says Kakashi.

"Could this be faster please?" says Shikamaru.

"Ok, question number 15! And it is..." Kakashi starts to say when he looks confused. "Anko, is this question even answerable?"

"Yes, it is. Have you seen the commercial?" says Anko.

"Fine." says Kakashi. "Shikamaru, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop according to Mr.Owl?"

"What kind of question is that!!" yells Ino from the audience.

"A stupid one!" hisses Kakashi. "Is it A. 100,476, B.3, C.7, or D.1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000." Kakashi takes a few giant breathes. "Try to say that five times fast!"

"Is it A. 100,476, B.3, C.7, or D.1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, Is it A. 100,476, B.3, C.7, or D.1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, Is it A. 100,476, B.3, C.7, or D.1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, Is it A. 100,476, B.3, C.7, or D.1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, Is it A. 100,476, B.3, C.7, or D.1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000... not that hard Kakashi." says Anko.

"Well... I'll use ask the audience." says Shikamaru yawning.

"Ok, audience, VOTE!" says Kakashi.

_Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding..._

"Ok! Time's up!" says Kakashi. "Let's see the results!"

**A- 7 percent,**

**B- 87 percent,**

**C- 2 percent,**

**D- 4 percent.**

"So what is your answer Shikamaru?" asks Kakashi.

"My answer is based on the commercial." says Shikamaru. "My answer is B. three."

"And you are..." starts Kakashi.

"And now for a word from our sponsor!" says Anko.

**"Mr owl? How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?"**

**"Let's find out..."**

**"..."**

**"One, Two, Three... CRUNCH!"**

**"..."**

**"Three."**

"Thank you." says Anko.

"Well, according to our commercial you are correct!" says Kakashi. "And you have won 1,000,000 dollars!" yells Kakashi.

"GOOD JOB SHIKA!" yells Ino. Kakuzu walks outside.

_Do daa daa, do doo, da daaa daaaaaaaaa da!_

"Can I leave now?" asks Shikamaru taking the check for 1,000,000 dollars.

"Yeah sure." says Kakashi. "Join us next time on, Who Wants To Be a Millionaire! Thank you, Goodnight!"

* * *

Author's note- let's see who's next...


	9. Caller Number 10 and Many Shout Outs!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto or Who Wants to be a Millionaire.

Author's note- Sorry I took so long...

* * *

_Last time on Who Wants to be a Millionaire..._

**"Well, according to our commercial you are correct!" says Kakashi. "And you have won 1,000,000 dollars!" yells Kakashi.**

**"GOOD JOB SHIKA!" yells Ino. Kakuzu walks outside.**

_**Do daa daa, do doo, da daaa daaaaaaaaa da!**_

**"Can I leave now?" asks Shikamaru taking the check for 1,000,000 dollars.**

**"Yeah sure." says Kakashi. "Join us next time on, Who Wants To Be a Millionaire! Thank you, Goodnight!"**

_Now for the continuation..._

"Well now for our next contestant!" says Kakashi. "And it is... whoever caller number 10 is!" Just then the phone on the table rings.

"Well, are you answering it?" asks Anko.

"Ok, caller number nine..." says Kakashi.

"What happened to callers 1-8?" asks Anko.

"It's too troublesome to wait that long..." says Kakashi.

"I think Shikamaru rubbed off on you." says Anko rolling her eyes.

"Did that sound perverted or was it just me?" asks Kakashi.

"Just you." says Anko.

"Oh, yeah, caller number nine." says Kakashi remembering. He picks up the phone. "Hello?... No, I'm sorry... number nine... yeah." Then Kakashi thinks for a minute. "Yeah... could you send over a cheese pizza?... Same to you!..." Then Kakashi hangs up. "The nerve of some people."

"Who was it?" asks Anko.

"Pizza delivery Guy." says Kakashi.

"Ok." says Anko. Then the phone rings again.

"Caller number 10!" says Kakashu enthusiastically picking up the phone.

"HI! TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!" yells 'someone' on the phone loud enough for everyone to hear. Kakashi drops the phone from the high level of decibles.

"Hi..." says Kakashi picking up the phone again.

"HI! TOBI! DID TOBI WIN?!" yells Tobi.

"Yes..." says Kakashi blocking his ears.

"YAY!! TOBI WINS!"yells Tobi. Suddenly a knock comes on the door and Kakashi hangs up the phone. Kakashi walks over to the door and opens it to be trampled by Tobi and a whole bunch of fangirls.

"Ow..."says Kakashi. The fangirls sit in the audience and Tobi walks over to Kakashi and helps him up.

"Tobi's sorry!" says Tobi.

"It's ok..." says Kakashi walking back onto the stage with Tobi. "So Welcome Tobi!" says Kakashi.

"Can Tobi give a shout out?" asks Tobi.

"Uh..." says Kakashi looking Anko's box, Anko shrugs her shoulders.

"Why not?" says Anko.

"YAY!" yells Tobi. "TOBI WANTS TO SAY HI TO DEIDARA-SEMPAI, ITACHI, HIDAN, KAKUZU, ZETZU, OROCHIMARU, KISAME, KONAN, PEIN-SAMA, KABUTO, SASUKE, SAKURA, NARUTO, NEJI, SHIKAMARU, INO, KONOHAMARU, INARI, TEN-TEN, ROCK LEE, ASUMA, ALL OF THE ANBU PEOPLES, CHOJI, GAI, IRUKA, PEOPLE FOLLOWING TOBI FOR THE PAST THREE YEARS, THE PEOPLE IN THE WHITE JACKETS THAT SAY TOBI'S A GOOD BOY WHEN DEIDARA TELLS TOBI TO GO TO THE CRAZY PLACE AND TOBI LISTENS, SASORI EVEN IF HE CAN'T HEAR ME, KAKASHI, ANKO, ALL OF TOBI'S FANS, DEIDARA'S FAN, CHOJI'S FANS, TEMARI, GAARA (PLEASE DON'T KILL TOBI!), KANKURO, PEOPLE LISTENING AND/OR READING WHAT TOBI IS SAYING, NEJI'S FANS, GAARA'S FANS, KANKURO'S FANS, TEMARI'S FANS, ITACHI'S FANS, KISAME'S FANS, OROCHIMARU'S FANS, SHIKAMARU'S FANS, INO'S FANS, ROCK LEE'S FANS, SASORI'S FANS, GAI'S FANS, SAKURA'S FANS, NARUTO'S FANS, SASUKE'S FANS, KONAN'S FANS, PEIN-SAMA'S FANS, OUR REVIEWERS, LIGHT YAGAMI, AKAMARU-"

"ARE YOU QUITE DONE YET?" intterupts Kakashi.

"NO! TOBI HARDLY EVEN STARTED!" yells Tobi.

"Too bad, we're starting Who Wants To Be a Millionaire!" says Kakashi flashing an awkward Gai-sensei smile.

"BUT TOBI'S NOT DONE YET!" yells Tobi.

"Too bad!" says Kakashi. "Question number-"

"ALSO TOBI SAYS HI TO SHINO, HINATA, KIBA, TSUNADE, JARIAYA, ZABUZA, HAKU, HAKU'S BUNNY, OBITO, KURENAI, SHIZUNE, SHINO'S FANS, HINATA'S FANS, KIBA'S FANS, TSUNADE'S FANS, JARIAYA'S FANS, ZABUZA'S FANS, HAKU'S FANS, OBITO'S FANS, L (OR RYUZAKI), PEOPLE THAT LIKE CHOCOLATE, PEOPLE THAT HATE CHOCOLATE, PEOPLE THAT HATE TOBI (THAT'S YOU DEIDARA-SEMPAI, AGAIN!), DEATH NOTE FANS, BLEACH FANS, ANIME FANS, STAR TREK FANS (LIVE LONG AND PROSPER TREKKIES, TREKKERS, OR TREKKIERS), THAT GUY WHO SAID HE WAS GOING TO KILL TOB-" starts Tobi again while Kakashi bangs his head on the wall saying 'angst, angst, angst...'

"Question number one!" says Kakashi.

_Dun du du dun dun du duuuun duuuuuuuuuuun du!_

"I guess we're... done..." says Anko holding her head. Tobi gave her a headache.

"Thank you..." says Kakashi to himself.

"Oh, Tobi forgot to thank Masashi Kishimoto! THANK YOU MASASHI KISHIMO-" starts Tobi.

"See you next time on who wants to be a millionaire..." says Kakashi.

* * *

Author's note- There. Tobi has entered the show, but for now he has left the building.


	10. Flashback and Questions 1 and 2!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto.

Author's note- I'm bored again... Tobi is fun to write about. Anyways, I want to thank Ryuchael for reminding me about Misa. Oh, and please don't forget this is rated T. This chapter has a little bit to do with Hidan (flashback) so as a warning: the flashback has a few (Ha! A few... yeah right!) swears in it.

* * *

_Last time on Who Wants to be a Millionaire..._

**"ALSO TOBI SAYS HI TO SHINO, HINATA, KIBA, TSUNADE, JARIAYA, ZABUZA, HAKU, HAKU'S BUNNY, OBITO, KURENAI, SHIZUNE, SHINO'S FANS, HINATA'S FANS, KIBA'S FANS, TSUNADE'S FANS, JARIAYA'S FANS, ZABUZA'S FANS, HAKU'S FANS, OBITO'S FANS, L (OR RYUZAKI), PEOPLE THAT LIKE CHOCOLATE, PEOPLE THAT HATE CHOCOLATE, PEOPLE THAT HATE TOBI (THAT'S YOU DEIDARA-SEMPAI, AGAIN!), DEATH NOTE FANS, BLEACH FANS, ANIME FANS, STAR TREK FANS (LIVE LONG AND PROSPER TREKKIES, TREKKERS, OR TREKKIERS), THAT GUY WHO SAID HE WAS GOING TO KILL TOB-" starts Tobi again while Kakashi bangs his head on the wall saying 'angst, angst, angst...'**

**"Question number one!" says Kakashi.**

_**Dun du du dun dun du duuuun duuuuuuuuuuun du!**_

**"I guess we're... done..." says Anko holding her head. Tobi gave her a headache.**

**"Thank you..." says Kakashi to himself.**

**"Oh, Tobi forgot to thank Masashi Kishimoto! THANK YOU MASASHI KISHIMO-" starts Tobi.**

**"See you next time on who wants to be a millionaire..." says Kakashi.**

_Now the continuation..._

"Welcome back to-" starts Kakashi.

"TOBI'S HERE!" yells Tobi running around Kakashi. Kakashi glances at where Anko is.

"Who wants-" says Kakashi.

"TOBI'S HERE!"

"To-be-a-millionaire!" Kakashi finishes quickly.

"TOBI'S HE-" starts Tobi.

"WE KNOW!" yells Kakashi. Then he takes a few deep breathes. "Take a seat..."

"Yay!" says Tobi. "Tobi needs to do his shout outs again! No one will remember them!"

"Trust me people will remember them." says Kakashi.

"But Tobi forgot some people!" says Tobi.

"Who could you possible miss!" says Kakashi.

"Well Tobi was walking yesterday and he met someone who told Tobi that Tobi forgot Misa! How could Tobi forget Misa! I'D LIKE TO GIVE A SHOUT OUT TO MISA AND TO RYUCHEAL (FOR REMINDING TOBI ABOUT MISA)! LET'S START AGAIN!" says Tobi.

"Oh no..." says Kakashi. "If you're going to say it again say it really fast."

"Ok! TOBI WANTS TO SAY HI TO DEIDARA-SEMPAI, ITACHI, HIDAN, KAKUZU, ZETZU, OROCHIMARU, KISAME, KONAN, PEIN-SAMA, KABUTO, SASUKE, SAKURA, NARUTO, NEJI, SHIKAMARU, INO, KONOHAMARU, INARI, TEN-TEN, ROCK LEE, ASUMA, ALL OF THE ANBU PEOPLES, CHOJI, GAI, IRUKA, PEOPLE FOLLOWING TOBI FOR THE PAST THREE YEARS, THE PEOPLE IN THE WHITE JACKETS THAT SAY TOBI'S A GOOD BOY WHEN DEIDARA TELLS TOBI TO GO TO THE CRAZY PLACE AND TOBI LISTENS, SASORI EVEN IF HE CAN'T HEAR ME, KAKASHI, ANKO, ALL OF TOBI'S FANS, DEIDARA'S FAN, CHOJI'S FANS, TEMARI, GAARA (PLEASE DON'T KILL TOBI!), KANKURO, PEOPLE LISTENING AND/OR READING WHAT TOBI IS SAYING, NEJI'S FANS, GAARA'S FANS, KANKURO'S FANS, TEMARI'S FANS, ITACHI'S FANS, KISAME'S FANS, OROCHIMARU'S FANS, SHIKAMARU'S FANS, INO'S FANS, ROCK LEE'S FANS, SASORI'S FANS, GAI'S FANS, SAKURA'S FANS, NARUTO'S FANS, SASUKE'S FANS, KONAN'S FANS, PEIN-SAMA'S FANS, OUR REVIEWERS, LIGHT YAGAMI, AKAMARU, SHINO, HINATA, KIBA, TSUNADE, JARIAYA, ZABUZA, HAKU, HAKU'S BUNNY, OBITO, KURENAI, SHIZUNE, SHINO'S FANS, HINATA'S FANS, KIBA'S FANS, TSUNADE'S FANS, JARIAYA'S FANS, ZABUZA'S FANS, HAKU'S FANS, OBITO'S FANS, L (OR RYUZAKI), PEOPLE THAT LIKE CHOCOLATE, PEOPLE THAT HATE CHOCOLATE, PEOPLE THAT HATE TOBI (THAT'S YOU DEIDARA-SEMPAI, AGAIN!), DEATH NOTE FANS, BLEACH FANS, ANIME FANS, STAR TREK FANS (LIVE LONG AND PROSPER TREKKIES, TREKKERS, OR TREKKIERS), THAT GUY WHO SAID HE WAS GOING TO KILL TOBI, MASASHI KISHIMOTO, AND MISA (AGAIN; SORRY I FORGOT YOU EARLIER), AND EVERYONE TOBI MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE FORGOTTEN!" yells Tobi in one breath.

"Just being _around_ him makes me tired..." says Kakashi. "Oh, yeah, I forgot to ask you Tobi, do you have any friends or family in the audience?"

"Well, everyone's Tobi's friends!" says Tobi, this is followed by fangirl shrieks of happiness at finding out they are Tobi's friends.

"Well, anyone you know the name of?" asks Kakashi.

"They all talked with Tobi yesterday so...Tobi knows all of thier names!" says Tobi, this is followed by more screaming happiness from the fan girls.

"I mean people you've known for a long time." says Kakashi.

"Oh, well Tobi took Deidara-sempai, Kakuzu, Zetzu, Konan, Pein-sama, Itachi, and Kisame along with Tobi." says Tobi. "Is that what you mean?"

"Yes, exactly." says Kakashi. "Wait, how about Hidan?"

"Oh, well Tobi needs someone for phone a friend!" says Tobi.

"Question number One..."

"YAY! TOBI GETS TO START!" yells Tobi.

"...number one!" says Kakashi. "What is the capital of Spain? Is it A.Amsterdam, B.Madrid, C.Sacramento, or D.Japan?"

"Uh... Tobi... Tobi thinks it is... uh... Tobi... B! NO A! NO D! NO C! NO B!" says Tobi

"Well, which is it? Remember you have three life lines. Phone a friend, ask the audience, and 50-50." says Kakashi, secretly hoping that Tobi will fail now and leave.

"Uh... Tobi says... B." says Tobi.

"Is that your final answer?" asks Kakashi.

"Uh.. yes, no, maybe... Yes! B is Tobi's final answer!" says Tobi.

"That is..." starts Kakashi.

"TOBI JUST CAN'T TAKE THE SUSPENSE!" yells Tobi bouncing up and down in his seat.

"Correct!" says Kakashi.

"YAY! DID YOU HEAR THAT DEIDARA-SEMPAI? TOBI DID IT! TOBI DID IT! YAY! TOBI DID IT!" yells Tobi.

"Only..." Kakashi thinks for a minute, "14... left to go!"

"YAY!" says Tobi bouncing again.

"Ok, now for the next question!" says Kakashi.

"Yay! Yay! Yay!" says Tobi.

"Ok. Question number...2. What does _TNG_ stand for in _Star Trek TNG_" asks Kakashi. "Does it stand for A._Ten Neggotiated Galaxies_, B. _The Next Generation_, C. _Two Nervous Guys_, or D. _Trigons Never Guess_. You know, I was totaly into Star Trek for a few months, but when Tasha Yar died, well it ruined the whole series..."

"Kakashi, no one really cares." says Anko.

"Yeah I figured that." says Kakashi.

"Can Tobi answer yet?" asks Tobi.

"Yes, you can answer." says Kakashi.

"Yay! Tobi watches Star Trek TNG all the time! Tobi can't decide whether he's a trekkie or a trekker or a trekkier! But Tobi stopped watching it because Deidara-sempai said it was annoying, and because Hidan chopped the tv in half with his sythe and then threatened Tobi... when Tobi..." Tobi stops suddenly remembering what happened. Tobi sits lower in his chair. He hasn't liked Hidan sense then. Tobi was just trying to be nice... but no... Hidan only cared about... about his 'ritual.'

* * *

**_Flash Back_**

_"Hi Hidan-san! Tobi wants to tell you something!" says Tobi after watching the original Star Trek for four hours._

_"Go away asshole." says Hidan trying to pray._

_"But-"_

_"Go away." says Hidan closing his eyes._

_"But Tobi wants to tell you to-"_

_"You can't fucking tell me to do anything!" yells Hidan opening his eyes and taking his sythe in his hand._

_"That's not what Tobi meant!" yells Tobi._

_"I don't fucking care!" yells Hidan standing up, sythe in hand._

_"Tobi just wanted to say to Live long and Prosper!" says Tobi. Hidan looks at Tobi. Tobi had interrupted Hidan's ritual._

_"Fuck you." says Hidan smashing the tv in half with his sythe and turning towards Tobi._

_"Pein-sama's not going to be happy Hidan-san..." says Tobi._

_"I don't give a shit about what Pein thinks!" says Hidan picking up Tobi with one hand and holding his sythe up to his neck. "If you fucking interupt me when I'm praying or doing anything else just one fucking time more I'll-"_

_"Tobi won't do it again Hidan-san! Tobi pro-" starts Tobi, but stops when Hidan pushes the sythe harder against Tobi's neck._

_"I told you not to fucking interupt me!" yells Hidan. Tobi can't respond, he's finding it hard to even breathe. "One more fucking time and I swear I will fucking murder yo-" Hidan cuts short when he hears the door knob turn. Hidan takes his sythe away from Tobi's neck and let's Tobi fall to the floor. Then Hidan turns away from Tobi._

_The door opens and just as Deidara walks in to make sure Tobi didn't do anything stupid, Hidan pushes his way past Deidara and through the door; slamming it behind him._

_Tobi sits up and rubs his neck. Then he looks down at the hand he had rubbed his neck with; It had blood on it. Tobi wasn't sure what happened next; he had fallen unconsious after that..._

**_Flash Back Over_**

* * *

"Ok, what's your answer?" asks Kakashi bringing Tobi back to reality.

"Uh... Tobi's answer is B... the next generation..." says Tobi still kind of dazed.

"And that is... correct..." says Kakashi sadly.

"YAY! TOBI GOT ANOTHER ONE! SEE DEIDARA-SEMPAI! I TOLD YOU THAT TOBI WOULD BE ABLE TO GET PAST TWO QUESTIONS! " says Tobi snapping back to reality and not picking up on Kakashi's dissappointment.

_Doo, da da, doo doo, da da daaaa, da!_

"Akk!" says Kakashi falling over and quickly getting up. "Almost everytime..."

"Ok, looks like we're done!" says Anko. Tobi stands up and runs around the stage trying to find the door.

"See you next time on Who Wants to be a Millionaire..." says Kakashi tiredly; unsure he can take Tobi being here another minute.

* * *

Author's note- There's another chapter for you. That flash back could have been a one shot in itself...


	11. Kakashi needs ANGER MANAGEMENT!

Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto nor Who Wants to be a Millionaire...

Author's Note- Sorry I took so long... my bad. Really busy.

* * *

_Last time on Who Wants to be a MIllionaire..._

**"Uh... Tobi's answer is B... the next generation..." says Tobi still kind of dazed.**

**"And that is... correct..." says Kakashi sadly.**

**"YAY! TOBI GOT ANOTHER ONE! SEE DEIDARA-SEMPAI! I TOLD YOU THAT TOBI WOULD BE ABLE TO GET PAST TWO QUESTIONS! " says Tobi snapping back to reality and not picking up on Kakashi's dissappointment.**

_**Doo, da da, doo doo, da da daaaa, da!**_

**"Akk!" says Kakashi falling over and quickly getting up. "Almost everytime..."**

**"Ok, looks like we're done!" says Anko. Tobi stands up and runs around the stage trying to find the door.**

**"See you next time on Who Wants to be a Millionaire..." says Kakashi tiredly; unsure he can take Tobi being here another minute.**

_Now for the continuation..._

"Hello and Welcome back to who wants to be a millionaire!" says Kakashi. "Sorry we took so long for this showing, but my dad was getting married and I had alot of work to do."

"You have a dad?" asks Anko.

"Yeah... and he got married." says Kakashi slowly so Anko would understand.

"Riiight." says Anko. Kakashi nods. "Here's Tobi...!" _Oh yay..._

"Hi People!" says Tobi sounding a little bit more than alot hyper. He starts jumping up and down.

"Uh... I should probably get back to the wedding now..." asks Kakashi.

"Oh no. We're here... so we're doing the show." whispers Anko.

"But... it's my dad." whispers Kakashi.

"YOUR DAD ISN'T ALIVE!" yells Anko.

"...yeah, ...no. He just lives far away." whispers Kakashi.

"Really?" asks Anko. Kakashi knods his head.

"Tobi thinks we should start..." says Tobi whispering like Kakashi and Anko were before.

"STAY OUT OF IT!" yells Anko. Tobi sits down sadly. "I mean... uh... yes, Kakashi let's start..."

"Ok." says Kakashi with a thumbs up and a Gai-sensei smile.

"Kakashi...?" says Anko.

"Yes?" asks Kakashi in the same position.

"Never do that again." says Anko. Kakashi gains his composure.

"Yeah..." says Kakashi.

"YOUTH!" yells Gai from the audience.

"Anko... owhay idday ehay etgay erehay?" asks Kakashi. Anko shrugs.

"He wasn't here five minutes ago..." says Anko.

"Uh, guys? Tobi wants to keep on playing..." says Tobi.

"Not yet Tobi." says Anko.

"TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!" yells Tobi.

"Then wait quietly." hisses Kakashi recieving many 'boos' from the audience. The phone rings. Kakashi looks at Anko and gestures to pick up the phone and Anko rolls her eyes, but picks up the phone.

"Hello?" Anko says. Anko turns to Kakashi. "It's someone giving a message from Regis Philbin." Kakashi nervously takes the phone from Anko.

"Hello?" asks Kakashi. "Wait wait! I won't do it again; Just one more chance!" Kakashi looks around. "I know. I know." Someone yells on the other end. "Fine we'll get on with the show and I won't hiss at any of the contestants..." Someone says something on the other line. "Fine. _And_ I'll get anger management, but not during the next show." More yelling. "Fine fine. I'll call a replacement... yeah. Bye... yeah, of coarse Regis can come to my dad's wedding! It's in Nova Scotia in three hours. Yeah, I'm going to be late." Kakashi hangs up.

"Nova Scotia?" asks Anko.

"Yeah. My dad lives in Canada." says Kakashi. Iruka starts humming 'Canadian Idiot.' Kakashi looks over at him. Iruka stops.

"Sorry..." says Iruka.

"OH! DOES KAKASHI NEED A REPLACEMENT FOR TOMMOROW?!" yells Tobi cutting in.

"Yes, I do. I have anger management..." grumbles Kakashi. Anko starts laughing. Kakashi glares, suprisingly good for only one eye showing, at her.

"OH! Oh! Tobi can be the replacement!" says Tobi.

"Sure." says Kakashi

"Kakashi... he can't be the host and the contestant." says Anko.

"Oh yeah..." says Kakashi. "Anyways we should probably start with question 3..."

"Yay!" says Tobi.

"Question three, in the movie 'The Matrix' what does the oracle tell Neo is ok before Neo even knocks it over?" asks Kakashi. "Is it A.a cookie, B.a vase, C.a blender, or D. a toaster?"

"Well duh," says Tobi, "Tobi says it's B. a vase."

"And you are..." says kakashi pausing for the dramatic effect, "CORRECT!"

"Question number four. How many sides does and octogon have?" says Kakashi moving right along. "Is it A.4, B.8, C.20, or D.6?"

"Uh... Uh..." says Tobi.

"Do you want to use a life line...?" asks Kakashi bored.

"Yeah..." says Tobi.

"Which one...?" asks Kakashi.

"Tobi will use ask the audience...?" says Tobi looking at Deidara.

"Ok. Audience, pick A, B, C, or D." says Kakashi. Then he waits three minutes while the audience votes.

...

...

...

"Ok, here's the results!" says Kakashi way over enthusiastically.

**A. 7 percent**

**B. 90 percent**

**C. 2 percent**

**D. 2 percent**

"Wait a minute..." says Kakashi before mumbling, "7... 97... 99... 101? That's not right. 101 percent all together? Anko...?"

"I don't know." says Anko shrugging.

"Whatever..." says Kakashi scratching his head. "Which do you pick Tobi?"

"Tobi picks... A... no. b. B. Tobi picks B." says Tobi rocking his head back and forth like a happy little child.

"Uh... yeah.. and that's correct..." says Kakashi. "Anko? anCay eway inishfay puay?"

"No, we still have ten minutes." says Anko rolling her eyes.

"Awww, man..." says Kakashi.

"You sound like Swiper the Fox from Dora the Explora!" says Tobi. "SWIPER NO SWIPING! SWIPER NO SWIPING! SWIIIIIIIIPPPPPPEEEERRR NOOOOO SSSWWWWWIIIIIIPPPPIIIIIINNNNGGG!!" Kakashi face palms.

"The only fox that would swipe thing in the area is probably Naruto..." says Kakashi putting his hand in his pocket. "Hey! Who took my wallet? NARUTO! I need that I.D. to buy my books!!" yells Kakashi running out of the building to find Naruto (Knew alias, SWIPER THE FOX!)

"Well, I guess that concludes tonight's show..." says Anko irritably. "And we still need that replacement for tommorow..."

"Tobi wants to! TOBI WANTS TO!" yells Tobi.

"Fine." says Anko too tired to argue. "You can be the host and the contestant tomorrow ok?"

"YES! TOBI SO WINS!" yells Tobi.

"Yeah..." says Anko.

"So good night and tune in next time on Wh-" starts Anko, but Tobi cuts her off.

"TOBI WANTS TO SAY IT!" says Tobi. Anko opens her mouth to speak, but Tobi continues. "PICK TOBI! Oooooo! PICK TOBI! OMG (XD) PICK TOBI!"

"Fine, say it." says Anko rolling her eyes.

"YES!" says Tobi. "SO GOOD NIGHT AND TUNE IN NEXT TIME ON 'WHO WANTS TO BE A MILIONAIRE!"

"Yeah..." says Anko. "Next time with extra added Tobi... as the host and contestant. How he'll pull that off I have no idea..."

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Author's Note- I'm sooo sorry that this is sooo late. I've been busy and so I had to try and write more. There it was, please be patient with me, but you know, a good source of inspiration to write comes from reviews. XD So read and review!


	12. Edward ends Tobi's Turn

Disclaimer- I in no way, shape, or form own Naruto or Who Wants to be a Millionaire or Full Metal Alchemist.

Author's Note- Sorry for the long wait, life suddenly got overly busy...

* * *

_Last time on WHO WANTS TO BA A MILLIONAIRE..._

**"Fine." says Anko too tired to argue. "You can be the host and the contestant tomorrow ok?"**

**"YES! TOBI SO WINS!" yells Tobi.**

**"Yeah..." says Anko.**

**"So good night and tune in next time on Wh-" starts Anko, but Tobi cuts her off.**

**"TOBI WANTS TO SAY IT!" says Tobi. Anko opens her mouth to speak, but Tobi continues. "PICK TOBI! Oooooo! PICK TOBI! OMG (XD) PICK TOBI!"**

**"Fine, say it." says Anko rolling her eyes.**

**"YES!" says Tobi. "SO GOOD NIGHT AND TUNE IN NEXT TIME ON 'WHO WANTS TO BE A MILIONAIRE!"**

**"Yeah..." says Anko. "Next time with extra added Tobi... as the host and contestant. How he'll pull that off I have no idea..."**

_And now for the continuation..._

"Welcome back to 'Who wants to ba a millionaire!" says Anko looking around for Tobi. Where's that kid go?

"TOBI'S HERE! NOT LATE NOT LATE NOT LAAAAAAATTTTTEEEE!!" yells Tobi running through the door.

"And here's you host and/or contestant... Tobi!" says Anko.

"Hello and welcome to Who Wants To Be a Millionaire!!" says Tobi sitting in the host's chair. Then he runs over to the contestant's chair.

"Why thank you Tobi." says Tobi. Then he runs back to the hosts chair.

"You're very welcome Tobi. Are you ready for your first question?" asks Tobi, then he goes back to the Contestant's chair.

"Of coarse Tobi!" says Tobi.

**_Meanwhile; Over in Resembool; getting his automail repaired..._**

"What the hell? I can't walk so I decide to watch a little tv and what happens to my favorite show? The contestant ruins it..." grumbles Edward.

"What's the matter brother?" asks Al.

"Nothing..." says Edward; his automail being re-put on. Edward flinches.

**_Back on set..._**

"Tobi and Tobi should get to the first question..." says Tobi sitting in the host's chair again.

"Yeah..." says Tobi running to the contestant's chair. He's panting now.

"Tobi... this isn't working... I'm calling a replacement." says Anko.

"NOOOO!" yells Tobi before passing out.

"Ha. I win..." says Anko picking up the phone dialing anumber of an old friend of her's. Someone picks up...

"Hey, could you come host the show today?" asks Anko. (The phone's pretty loud, everyone can hear it...)

_"Of coarse I could. Anything for my favorite show that is in need..."_

"Really? That'd be great," says Anko relieved.

_"Yeah."_

"SO hurry and get over here shortly! We have a show to film!" says Anko.

_"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT YOU WANT TO CRUSH HIM LIKE AN ANT?! I'LL RIP YOUR FEET OF AND STICK THEM TO YOUR HEAD!"_

"I SAID GET HERE SHORTLY NOT GET HERE SHORTY!!" says Anko hanging up. That kid...

**_Five Minutes Later..._**

"I'm here!" yells Edward running onto the set.

"Finally..." says Anko.

"Well it's only been five minutes!" says Edward annoyed.

"Well get started." says Anko.

"Ok! Tobi!" Edward looks around. "Tobi...?"

"TObi's here..." says Tobi slightly raising his hand slightly. Edward helps him up.

"Wow... and Tobi thought that Tobi was short..." says Tobi.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL YOU CAN'T SEE HIM WITHOUT A MAGNIFINE GLASS!" yells Edward.

"But... Tobi didn't mean..." says Tobi.

"WHATEVER! Question... number... SEVEN!" says Edward.

"We're on question 5." says Anko.

"Well now we're on 7." says Edward.

"No we're not." says Anko.

"You know... it's been a while sense I've killed someone, wyou wanna watch?" asks Edward.

"No..." says Anko. "Fine... we're on 7..."

"Great! Question number 7!" says Edward. He glances at the question on the index card. It says 'what is the square root of 9?' "Well screw that! I'll ask the only question that matters and if you get it right I'll give you the million dollars."

"No Edward... that's not how the show works." says Anko.

"WELL THAT'S TOO DAMN BAD!" yells Edward.

"Ok..." says Tobi.

"How can I make the philosopher's stone without having to kill people?" asks Edward.

"Uh..." says Tobi.

"...Edward, I don't think that's a fair question..." says Anko.

"Too bad! Life isn't fair." says Edward.

"Uh..." continues Tobi. "Can Tobi have an easier question?"

"Fine." says Edward. "I'll ask you the second most important question! AM I SHORT?"

"Uh..." starts Tobi. "No?"

"CORRECT!" says Edward happily. "You win ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"

"Edward! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" Yells Anko.

"Too bad." says Edward closing his eyes and handing Tobi a check for a million dollars.

"YYYYYAAAAAAYYYYY! SEMPAI LOOK LOOK TOBI WON TOBI WON!!" yells Tobi. Deidara closes his eyes.

_"Grrreeeaaaat. I'll never hear the end of this, un..."_ thinks Deidara.

So Tobi runs around in circles and off the stage in a happy flurry of joy and accomplishment. Deidara walks behind him.

"WAIT! YOU FORGOT YOUR CHECK!" yells Edward, But no one hears him.

"I'll take that..." says Kakuzu pocketing the check.

**_da doo da da da da da dooooooo da!_**

"Whatever creepo." says Edward. "See you next time on... WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE!"

* * *

Author's Note- Yeah... sorry about that. I'll try to keep FullMetal Alchemist out of it if people want me to...


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